RORY LOWE COMEDY
RORY LOWE COMEDY
TERRORIST IN FREMANTLE, WA
THERE WAS LITERALLY JUST A BOMB SCARE IN KINGS SQAURE, FREMANTLE and it was so funny!
This is what happened.
So, I'm in the Studio above the Myer building, in Kings Square, I'm just chilling, not doing anything to terroristy. Then the Ranger, a nobel figure of authority, who I always believed was a person who failed his Power Ranger apprenticeship, rushes in and starts yelling. "Ladies and Gentlemen... Im going to have to ask you to evacuate the building... there is a suspicious type of bomb downstairs"
a) im quite certain all bombs are suspicious.
b) im quite certain there is no bomb downstairs.
c) im quite certain the Ranger was suppose to say "suspicious bag" but just fucked it up because this was the closest he'd ever get to being a real power ranger.
So everyone in the studio goes downstairs, outside. AND THE WHOLE OF KINGS SQAURE HAS BEEN POLICE TAPED. It looks quite serious, until I see an old hippy lady on her fixie bike riding around in circles in the middle of the supposed explosion zone. She thinks she indestructable! "Ive got enough healing crystals to survive a nuclear holocaust!" she screamed to the heavens.... Ok she didnt, she was just peddling.
We're escorted out of the blast area, with the extreme fixie bike rider who's name is Gladis. She was lovely. And now were just staring at this empty taped off space. Now, I dont know much about bombs, but I do think if there is a bomb scare, you should probably have more than 3 policemen patrolling the area. One of which (this is all true) is getting into an extremely heated argument with a deliveryman. This deliveryman is yelling at the policeman "Look mate, Im not leaving here until I get someone to sign for that package."
I couldnt come up with this shit if I tried. Im my head whats happened is "Barry Omb" the forgetful electrician has left his bag, labelled B. Omb, of scrap wires somewhere. Only to be found by paranoid stoners who arent afraid of the police. Either than or some silly person got scared of an art installation.